How to Talk to Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere

• The basics of successful conversation: Honesty, the right attitude, interest in the other person, openness about yourself.
• Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects. Everybody is an expert on something.
• It’s better to have a reputation as someone who talks only when it counts than to be known as someone who has to put in his two cents’ worth on every subject.
• Be honest and you can never go wrong.
• Learn forward in your chair and ask them a question about themselves.
• Your listeners will always be able to tell whether you respect them. If they feel you do, they will listen more attentively as you talk.
• You should be as open and honest with your conversational partners as you’d want them to be with you.
• You should be willing to reveal the kind of information that you’d ask of another person. Telling people what your background is, what your likes and dislikes are, is part of the give and take of conversation. It’s how we get to know people.
• One of the first things to accomplish in talking to people is to put them at ease because most of us are naturally shy.
• People you’re talking to will enjoy the conversation more if they see you are presenting yourself as someone who’s enjoying it too.
• Remember that the person you are talking to is probably just as shy as you.
• Get them on comfortable ground. Ask them about themselves.
• Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours.
• Once you learn the person across from you has either kids or pets, you can be off and running, talking to them with the greatest of ease.
• Yes/no (closed ended) questions are the enemy of good talk. By their nature they produce answers of only one or two words.
• The first rule of conversation: Listen.
• If I’m going to learn a lot today, I’ll have to do it by listening.
• Show the people you talk to that you’re interested in what they’re saying.
• Careful listening makes you better able to respond- to be a good talker when it’s your turn.
• Good follow-ip questions are the mark of a good conversationalist.
• To be interesting, be interested.
• Ask questions they other persons will enjoy answering, don’t pester them.
• A person’s toothache means more to that person than a famine in China which kills a million people.
• Be careful about discussing religion or politics or don’t discuss them at all.
• In a social setting, don’t get caught in the same place for a long period of time. That’s where mingling becomes necessary if you are to represent yourself successfully.
• Asking questions is the secret of good conversation. My favorite question is “why?”
• One guaranteed way to get out of the conversation: “Excuse me. I have to visit the restroom.”
• Choose a topic that will involve everybody if you have to quarterback the conversation in a group.
• You’ll be remembered as abetter conversationalist if you ask the opinions of others around you.
• People who talk too much, in the opinion of others, pay a price and lose a certain degree of credibility.
• Know when to “get off stage” and quit talking.
• The best talkers take unexpected views on familiar topics, are enthusiastic, curious, empathize, and have a sense of humor.
• Be interesting and interested.
• Make your listener understand why you are passionate about the subject.
• The best conversationalists are curious about everything.
• When you tell someone you’ve got a new job, you’d like them to say “Wow! That’s great” not just “Oh, really?” So do the same when you are the listener in a conversation.
• Know what you’re selling; and once you’ve closed the deal- don’t keep selling.
• You must exude an air of success, not one of desperation. By acting as if you are negotiating from strength, you can gain the upper hand, even when your position is not a strong one.

Source: How to Talk to Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere by Larry King